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Justin samaan Haddad Glendale, AZ, USA

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I was with this, I’ll caLloyd him “individual” for quite a looong time. Too long for that matter. Let me start off by saying I knew he was crazy from very beginning, but I went against what my instincts told me for short term happiness. Ino the beginning he was so loving, charming, caring..did everything you’d think a guy loves you for and feeling bad you don’t feel the same back towards him. For a long time I didn’t love myself so I didn’t know what love really looked like. I struggled with figuring out if he even loved me at all since he said I love you in the first week of us dating. How is it possible to love someone so quickly without even knowing a thing about them i thought to myself..but he always assured me so hard of how much he truly loved me..it left me confused and feeling like shit. He always only was nice to me to have sex and it took me years to realize this. He always assured me he’d never cheat or lie to me because he doesn’t like to feel that feeling that he’s hiding something or a bad person..so I believed him..espically since he said he had never chested in the past and all his ex girlfriends we’re not even comparable to me..looks wise. I wanted to believe but I was always skeptical because of his actions went against what he had always said. In the very beginning of our relationship I found him commenting on another girls Meetme saying some foul nasty comments about the way she looked and it was a provocative picture. From there I ended everything. But the fact he gave me so much attention and “love”..3 days later I took him back because I “missed him” lol actually he just had the best dingaling I had had yet. A few more months into our relationship he was getting these texts from an ex who was calling him baby and all these things and he had deleted their previous convo so I knew some thing was wrong. When I asked him he got so scared, defensive, and tried to convince me nothing happened and he just did that to save me from getting hurt and he had told her not to call him that. From then on I knew he was a pos. By that time I was already pregnant so I couldn’t leave. He got me pregnant on his own, knowingly, without my knowledge or approvement. I was confused for a few weeks thinking, “is he cumming in me? No why would he do that and not say anything?” But the second I asked him I got this silence and funny smile back i knew he was and I FREAKED OUT needless to say. He admitted he had been doing it for weeks. I knew at that moment for sure I was pregnant. I knew I wasn’t ready, the day I found out I actually was I cried..not from excitement but of despair and disappointment. I knew he wasn’t who I wanted to have my baby with..I hated him for getting me pregnant the entire pregnancy I was just angry..plus his whole family thought I did it on purpose and it was my fault but I couldn’t tell anyone..they all hated me but acted nice fakely in my face always giving snarky remarks to try to bring me down. Anyways back to the point.. last year my mother died. It was the roughest time for me. I did not how to handle it, I took a lot of that anger out on him because he had not let me be close with her since I got with him. He had me isolate myself from all friends and family putting negative thoughts in my brain. I had a lot of resentment towards him for the way he treated my mom and how I could never see her. I felt all alone. I just wanted to die, so I tried to get him to kill me. I purposely would try to have him catch me talking to other guys so he would attack me and after the first few times I realized he would never actually kill me. I stopped trying to get him to hurt me..but it kept going on..only getting worse and worse. I felt helpless. Not old had I lost my mom, my protector, my everything, I was getting beaten for the “fun” of it just to still feel alive. I tried to get away..but when he found out he turned into the sweet loving Justin all over again.. he couldn’t stand the fact someone treating me how I actually deserved to be treated. About a month or two goes by..nothings changed, of course only getting worse with the beating. It was literally daily something would happen. I started keeping pictures and videos of what he would do to me so at least I’d have proof of that.. I might not get to record the way he talked to me or yelled at me everyday but the marks were easy to photograph. Begging ofor this year, 2017 I got the best surprise. I found all his texts with him cheating on me. I couldn’t believe it..the very thing he said he would NEVER do..he was doing. And for a long time. He would go to lunch with them buying them food..texting them while he would be buying us all food in the morning saying he could have gotten them something..asking for pictures, receiving, asking to have play dates with our children together? I was DISGUSTED. I tried to screenshot them all so I could send theme to his mom but it was 3 in the morning and I only got like an hour or two of sleep..so I was shaking so bad I could barley even keep my eyes open. I ended up locking the screen on accident. I didn’t know what to do, if I should kill him in his sleep or blast him or what revenge was best? I calmed myself down best I could and I started spending all his amazon gift cards online. Buying anything I could just so he had nothing lefto on them. I rubbed his toothbrush on my dirty ass and puccay, I felt great bUT still wasn’t enough. When he woke up he knew I had found the texts.. I tried to stay calm but after all the shit he had put me through I just got up and started wailing on him. Taking oit all my anger and heverything didn’t stop me because he knew how wrong he was. I didn’t have sex with him for 3 months and still I don’t feel that was enough, I ended up giving up because I was tired of him trying and me refusing. It had become a guilt trip on me. This guy is everything YOU DON’T WANT in your life. He’s a self centered narccisit on every level. I wouldn’t trust him if my life depended on it. He comes off very sweet and charming to people on the outside but he’s much darker than he seems. He has nothing good in him but hate for himself, and the entire world. He doesn’t respect anyone or even himself, parents included. I’ve even told them about some of the things hes done to me, dad doesn’t care at all, mom thinks she has control over him but literally has no say in how he truly is. He doesn’t listen to either of them or nobody but himself. He’s never wrong and is infamous for making everyone feelse like shit who’s around him. He drained me of my life, my youth, my sanity, my health. Did I mention he gave me herpes? Without me knowing he had it? Before our daughters 2nd birthday. He had it for that long and I never caught it in the 2 plus years of us dating.. I was so confused of whether or not he created on me or not during that time.,but the research that I had done told me guys can carry it without little to no symptoms without even knowing they have it..until a flare up occurs. Still not sure about that one but luckily I’ve learned it is treatable you can get rid of it. In beggining, when I found out I felt like I was dead for a few weeks. But through all his pain and suffering I’ve learned how to be stronger than I ever thought was possible. I’ve learned what true happiness is and how to love myself for everything that I am. AVOID THIS MAN at all costs.

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